Say cheese

"people who frown in photos are five times more likely to get a divorce than people who smile."

Online with the Christophers

You can hear the audio of my interview with Tony Rossi of The Christophers on their web site here.

Talk amongst yourselves

If you would like a .pdf file of chapter-by-chapter discussion questions for individual or group study drawn from Child of Divorce, Child of God, please contact me by email at steakley7 at yahoo dot com. The questions are written to the adult child of divorced parents and are designed to help you begin to apply the verses and thoughts shared in each chapter to your own life.

Coming to a bookstore near you...

I've just received word that Child of Divorce, Child of God is going into a second printing here in the U.S.

In related news, the Korean arm of InterVarsity Press has picked up Child of Divorce, Child of God and will be translating the book for publication in Korean. I'm told that process can take up to two years, but I'm grateful that our Korean friends will get to read the book in their own language.

Letting the (basketball) courts decide

I love this story on CNN's web site. This high school basketball coach in northern Ireland has formed a team of kids from the two sides of the religious and political spectrum, something of a miracle in a land that has seen decades of violence over those issues. What's even more inspiring, though, is that the kids on his team are all from broken homes.

These kids have all experienced conflict that could not be resolved--the conflict between their parents--but now they're being shown that perhaps even bigger conflicts can be resolved. What an amazing life lesson for them. Kudos to the coach and let's hope these guys can keep playing in peace and show their countrymen that our differences don't have to divide us.

When the elephant leaves

From a dad, writing in the Chicago Trib:

Most parents, whether together or apart, try not to have the messy circumstances of their own lives bleed into the world of their children. How many shoppers this season have said that they are determined not to let the dismal economy dampen the holiday? But sometimes truth is a missile, unavoidable. Kate remains young enough not to realize how her existence is different from that of many classmates because her mother and father do not live together. But the wheels are turning. She groups her beloved stuffed animals in family units. There must always be a mother and a father and a baby. That view of what is "normal" is bound to change. At some point, one of those elephants is going to take a powder.

Newsweek on divorce

Newsweek has a good article on the challenges of post-divorce parenting from the parent's perspective, along with a video featuring a 14-year-old girl talking about her daily life shuttling between two parents.

Star 88.3 interview

Here's a link to an interview I did with Melissa Montana on Star 88.3 out of Missouri. And here is part two of the interview.

Playing the trump card

From an article about Child of Divorce, Child of God on the Christian Grandparenting Network web site:

If you have ever played a card game involving the use of a "trump" card or suit, you know the frustration of playing what you think is a winning hand only to have it trumped by someone else. Now is the time for Christians to play our "trump card" -- our belief in an all powerful and loving God...As grandparents, we know all about the ravages of divorce, even as Christians. If you are living with the reality of divorce in your family, this is a place where "intentionality" is crucial. We are in a unique position to help our grandchildren of divorce find healing and hope. But it means we must build a solid framework of truth about the God who IS, and that He really does care about the burdens and wounds they bear.

BreakPoint on Child of Divorce

Today's BreakPoint commentary features Child of Divorce, Child of God. You can read the transcript or listen online here.

Time for Hope

Beginning this week, you can see a taped television interview I did with Dr. Freda Crews on her program titled Time for Hope. The program will be available on the Time for Hope web site, and you can click your state on this map to see when the program will air on television near you.

Divorce in WorldView

BreakPoint WorldView magazine is running an excerpt from Child of Divorce, Child of God. You can subscribe online for free and get links to a number of reprinted and original articles on a variety of topics from a decidedly Christian viewpoint.

Crosswalk excerpt

Crosswalk.com is running an excerpt from Child of Divorce, Child of God on their web site. Check it out here. And while you're there, leave a comment to let them (and me) know what you think.

On the radio and online, Monday

You can hear me talk about Child of Divorce, Child of God on Monday at 1 p.m. Central time for 45 minutes. I'll be on Northwestern College Radio's Along the Way program. The web site for the program is here and the streaming audio, where you can listen online, is here. If you live in the Twin Cities, Duluth, Fargo, Sioux Falls, Waterloo or Madison, you can listen on the radio.

Can you hear me now

Audio of my interview earlier this month with Ted Elm on WWJC's Northland Notebook in Minnesota is available online here.

Where in the World is my book?

Thanks to Susan Olasky at World magazine for reviewing Child of Divorce, Child of God. The review is available by subsciption only on World's web site or in the current print issue. Here's a teaser:

"Her memories strike a balance between ugly reality and compassion—this
isn't a blame-throwing volume, but it also won't provide comfort to those
wanting justification to divorce."

Heartbreaking

From a column in the Telegraph:

I am still trying to come to terms with my parents' divorce, 54 years ago. I've recently spent time with my 92-year-old father whom I hadn't seen for 25 years, and before that, for nearly 30. Following the divorce, Dad moved to Canada to start a new life and we heard little from him. He bought a computer for his 90th birthday and we began emailing, which is how we came to meet again. The two weeks we have just shared were very special. I felt a mixture of great happiness, because we got on so well, and sadness because I have missed so much.

Read more here.

Zing or sting?

Coming soon to a theater near you, a hilarious satire about grown children of divorce still caught in the crossfire. Hahahaha, I'm laughing already. At least it's billed as a dark comedy. The writers of the screenplay had this to say about their script being picked up by Miramax: "We're very glad to get the validation from Miramax, especially since we've been working on the script longer than any of our parents were married." Mom and Dad must be so proud.

Reality check for mom

From an Ask Amy column, a reader writes about her daughter's lingering emotions four years after the parents' divorce:

But my youngest daughter, 15, is having the hardest time coming to terms with it all. She is moody, gets upset easily and still yearns for life as it was before. She was very close to her dad, but he does only an average job of staying in touch with her. But I feel by now she should be used to life as it is.

How much longer is this going to take?

Oh, dear. At least Amy was willing to serve up a little reality for this mother. Read her answer here.

Redecorating divorce

From an advice column in an Oklahoma newspaper:

DEAR MI-LING: I am nearing the end of a painful divorce. I want to redo my home and make it my own, leaving behind all of the bad memories of this relationship. Is this healthy for my school-age children or should I keep some of the old memories in the house to help them feel comfortable?

Click here to read Mi-Ling's answer.