Thursday, April 06, 2006

On Catholics and divorce

from BREAKING VOWS: WHEN FAITHFUL CATHOLICS DIVORCE

"It's like the Church has let us go into the hands of a monster that is tearing our family apart, and the Church won't intervene," she said. "They just stand back and watch it happen. When I made my vows, I signed up for something different."
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"We live in a culture in which everything is disposable," said Gauthier, "including unborn children and spouses. This culture affects even the most faithful."
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marriage preparation gave him all the doctrinal answers but left him unprepared for the life that he would face.
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"You see the same phenomenon with medical students," said Father Brunetta. "As they study medicine, they begin to self-diagnose. Each new ache and pain is imagined to be an indication of the most virulent disease they know. Of course, precious few of them actually have spinal meningitis or pancreatic cancer. Normal aches and pains indicate life, not death."
In the same way, he said, "There are tensions and struggles and difficulties that are normal in the marriage—these are signs of health, not invalidity."
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They expected marriage to be exalted, like the Book of Revelation, like the wedding feast of the Lamb. And when they find out that theirs is not like they imagined, and they are not prepared to grow together and work through normal difficulties in their marriage, they start looking for a way out.
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"What really put a knock on my faith was that I kept turning to the Church saying, 'Please help us! Please help us!' But the focus seems to be on the acceptance of individuals in the Church after divorce. It almost seems as if priests do not want to address this issue because they are afraid of offending," he said.
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A marriage was Satan's first target in the Garden of Eden
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"My eleven-year-old son has taken a knock in terms of what he believes about God," he told me. "We've taught him the Faith, but he thinks that sometimes God won't answer prayers, because he prayed and prayed that we'd get back together again. And that didn't happen."

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